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Showing posts from November, 2016

Time to be an American

Being a Unitarian Universalist is not easy. My family has been blessed enough to have found our church just recently, but I have been an unlabeled UU my whole life.

We are peaceful people. We believe that all people have an inherent value no matter what giant assholes they may appear to be. We work hard to never devalue the opinions of other people. We respect opinions…ALL opinions.

Being a UU if damn HARD right now! If I have to hear my big hearted husband console one more of our-privileged white asshat acquaintances over how upset they are because people are calling them a racist, I am going to lose it. I seriously am.

Thank frak, he now sees them coming, and has stopped answering the phone calls.

I myself, have been waking up in a semi-nightmare-scape-twilight zone sort of space for the past two weeks. I am not supposed to be angry. Anger leads to fear and fear leads to hatred, so instead I am just distraught.

Upset, heartbroken, devastated. People ask me how I am and I say “fine”. Y…

Five Days Later.

I think that we are all still a little stunned. Wednesday I cried all morning and all afternoon. I cried so hard that I gave myself an unyielding headache and everything that I ate wanted to come right back up.

Wednesday night I watched the kids at church while their parents attended fellowship, so I had to pull out of it, paste on a smile & trudge on.

Thursday and Friday, thankfully, I had a large Thanksgiving party to prepare for, so I immersed myself in my cooking and my cleaning.

On Saturday, we marched for Gay Pride. It was powerful and important, and I think that we all gained some healing for being a part of it.

Early on Sunday, back with the kids at church again, and then home yesterday afternoon to exhausted to do much of anything but heat leftovers and take solace in Harry Potter movies.

Now, it is Monday Morning and I find myself crying at my desk again. Not with the same gut wrenching pain that I did that first day, but with the ongoing numbness that I have felt ever sinc…