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Showing posts from May, 2015

I Hope You Grow Up and Learn to Like Mayonnaise

I have been mom-ing since I was twenty-four years old, and I started out with teenaged foster boys.
I settled pretty firmly into the mom role from that point on, and it extends strongly to all of my close friends.
I make homemade soup for my friends when they are sick. I chase after people when they have been visiting to make sure that they have water and a snack for the trip home. I watch my friends who perform on stage over and over again like a proud little mother hen. Random children will come up to me when they are hurt or need help, and conversely do their best to stay away from me if I happen to notice that they are behaving badly. It is pretty funny.
I have some pretty solidly set opinions about behavior, and maturity, and growing up.
I believe that people should be expected to do and say deeply moronic things until they hit the age of about twenty-seven. I don’t believe in coddling children in any manner; I treat them like miniature adults. I believe that baby talk encourag…