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40 Things I Have Learned Not To Trust




I am turning 40 this week. I am incredibly grateful to be here, and for all that I have learned in the past forty years of my life.

This is a list of forty things/people that I have learned NEVER to place my trust in. This does not mean that they must always be avoided, but approached with the wisdom of deep and abiding skepticism.

I have learned to always follow the money trail in any situation. I have learned to always look to who stands to gain, or what power stands to be leveraged.

We do not live in a simple world, or an easy one. Without mustering the bravery to swim against the stream in this society, I honestly do not believe that I would be living the life that I am today.


Dentists - Dentistry is one of the biggest scams in modern America.
Charities - Look into them carefully & go for local.
The Komen Foundation - First charity call-out. These guys are hard core greedy.
The HSUS - Second Charity call-out. LIARS and animal murders.
Scientific Studies - Who paid for it?
Journalists - Most would sell grandma for a nickel.
Doctors - Research the hell out of them.
The Food Industry - They don’t care if you die.
Pharmaceutical Companies - In cahoots with the food industry. 

Public Schools - Disabled by bureaucracy. (I love teachers though.)
Private Schools - Elitist agendas.
Private Colleges - Greedy as all F**K! 
Lawyers - Keep rapists out of jail.
Bad Tippers - Screw you guys! 
Animal Activists - Misanthropes seeking to take away human rights.
Television - Happily here to numb you into complacency.
Cats - Love em’, but they’re shady as shit.
Wealthy People - People who are but don’t flaunt it are AWESOME!
People In Luxury Cars - Statistically more likely to run you over. 
Pro-Lifers - The ultimate control freaks. 
Seagulls - Also shady as shit.
Documentaries - Biased as all hell.
Veterinarians - Commit to finding one of the good ones. 
Christianity - Do as we say, not as Jesus did. 
Real Estate Agents - Again, there are a few good ones out there.
Car Salesmen - This should be obvious.
Any Craft Idea On Pinterest - Seriously.
Google Maps - Do I really need to explain? 
People Who Cannot Look You In The Eye - Please.
People Who Refuse To Acknowledge White Privilege - Just no! 
People Who Don’t Drink - I know you have your reasons, still…
People Who Never Curse - Statistically more dishonest.
Monsanto - AKA: SATAN.
Expert Witnesses - Paid to (lie to) make a point.
Security Guards - Come on, you know this one.
Anyone That My Dog Does Not Like - Duh! 
Anyone That Does Not Like Dogs - Duh! 
Prison Guards - DUDE! 
Poker Players - Professional Liars.
The Vaccine Schedule - Just made this up. Seems great. Don't ever question it.

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Allow the pie to cool for 30 minutes before slicing.




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