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The Movie Theater Effect

So, I don’t know if this happens to anyone else, but I have realized that every time I look at myself in a movie theater bathroom mirror my reflection looks particularly fabulous. I mean, absolutely every single time, different theaters, different points in my life, but it seems to be the magic location for my reflection. I wonder why that is? I started thinking about it after all of the reading that I have been doing about television and electronics lately. I think that I know why this happens.

So, if one little fifty inch television in my living room has the ability to hypnotize me into a more accepting state where I am more willing to believe information that is presented to me, then what kind of killer capacity does a movie screen have? They are like…well I have no idea how big the actually are, but they are really, really, big. There is also the super loud special surround sound system, (which is actually one of the reasons that I have become a lot less fond of going to the movies…they are uncomfortably loud for me,) and it is totally dark in those places. There are absolutely no distractions from a person’s focus on the experience. At home things are going on, people moving around, making noise. In a theater people shush you if you make a noise. A movie theater is like the opposite of a sensory deprivation chamber; it is a sensory focus box.

Since I already know that my mind is probably sort of being electronically doped up by all of these lights and sounds, and that I am most likely in a state where I am more receptive to suggestion. How big of a leap is it to question whether or not I don’t really look as super awesome in movie theater bathrooms as I think I do? I am probably just a heck of a lot more accepting of my physical form than I am when I am at home in my own bathroom and the kids are screaming in the background. I just don’t have my nice mushy-brained movie theater buzz going on at home. In a way, it would probably be productive for people in general, if we could bottle that suggestibility and administer it when we are standing at home in front of the mirror, scrutinizing our own forms…which we do way too much of, and are way to judgmental about. Unfortunately, everything has an equal power for good and evil.

You might want to think about it the next time that you go to see a film. It got me wondering just how much we are accepting in these movies. Like maybe they show the most attractive people in the very beginning, and bring in the ones that aren’t as attractive as we think they are in the middle when are brains have been rendered super squishy. Or maybe, the movies themselves aren’t really even half as good as we think they are; we have just been electronically doped into believing so. Heck, I can even drink beer in the movie theater by our house, the movies there could be absolutely terrible and I would probably still think that they are great. In light of all this, I have to say that I am glad that I have already read the book most times that I go to see a movie. Yes, I am saying all of this in fun, but it doesn’t mean that the theory isn’t based on something. I might recommend avoiding first dates at movies, and decision making too…beware the rose colored glasses.


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I actually really dislike Oprah Winfrey as a talk show host and television personality.

I was home with my kids when they were babies and I had her show on a lot. Then at one point I remember her and her friend going into a Walmart and just cracking up over the fact that they were so frigging isolated by their current wealth that they didn’t understand how things worked there. Like the way that the plastic hangers operated or something…

I remember being absolutely disgusted at their behavior. Not only that someone who presents her life story as having grown up in poverty would turn around and make fun of the fact that she doesn’t understand how people who are not as well off as her would live, but additionally to think that her audience is so much less intelligent than she is that not one of us would be offended by her behavior.

Well I was, and I haven’t watched a thing that woman has put out in the past ten years.

I do think she is a brilliant actress though, even so, I couldn’t watch …