Skip to main content

Easily Offended

Easily Offended

We all have the things that are the most likely to really bother us. For me it usually comes down to humorous banter that encourages discrimination. When I was young, and pretty stupid, I almost got a friend of mine beaten up because I stood up to a couple of guys who were speaking poorly of homosexuals. Luckily, my friend was very talented at talking his way out of things. We are all touchy about certain things, and our offended reactions to other people aren’t always well thought out. I have been…slowly…getting better at it, but it is something that I can still work on. I think that most of us can.

The reason that it can be so beneficial to let the offenses slip by, and get on with our lives, is because it makes life a lot easier on us to just let things go. The other day we were at dinner with a large group of friends. The service was terrible, and the poor server was scrambling all over the place trying to get our party taken care of. Finally, a higher-up came back from the kitchen with some of our food, and not only didn't he apologize for the poor service, but he chastised us for being in front of a fire exit. My buddy got so angry. He had every right in the world. He asked me if he was overreacting, and I told him of course not. The service was deplorable. But then, I really don’t notice those things too often anymore. And he understood what I meant. If I actually cared about the restaurant, I would tell the management so that they could improve the service, but since I didn't, there was really no need to waste my time or energy on the problem. So we went back to enjoying our time with our friends. I think that it was a much better choice than getting offended.

It is interesting to think about. I try to remember certain situations, but in most cases, when people get offended, there is something more to the reason they take offense than they will admit. I was very surprised when I received a lot of comments on an article lately refuting my suggestion that bad posture leads to…well, bad posture. To quote my cousin: “Yea, that's kind of a no brainer isn't it? If you have a history of bad posture you don't have the muscle structure you need to hold yourself correctly. Your muscles tighten and shorten relative to your posture, so once you've trained your muscles a certain way it's a huge challenge to retrain them.” This is what I have always known to be true, and yet I had quite a few seemingly upset and offended people writing about how posture has nothing to do with hunched shoulders…I still don’t understand it exactly. My best guess is that they may have poor posture themselves, and are placing the responsibility on a calcium deficiency, rather than on their choice to carry their body a certain way.

So now I am paying attention to see if I do this when I find myself offended. Do I misinterpret something that offends me as directed towards me specifically, rather than towards the world in general, and find the offense there? Are we more likely to be offended by people that we do not find a lot in common with, as opposed to the ones that we do? Regardless of why I feel it, I am convinced that I do myself good by just letting it go. I am glad that I have become a person that sometimes doesn’t notice situations where I could take offense. I think that it makes me a happier person in general, I am pretty sure that I have more fun, and I know that it reduces my stress. Next time you find yourself in a situation where your automatic reaction is to feel offended, take a minute and examine how important it really is to hold onto that emotion, or whether it might be more beneficial to you, to just let it go.


Popular posts from this blog

20 Things…you learn after moving to Florida.

20 Things…you learn after moving to Florida.
1.There is a big difference between a roach and a palmetto bug. Real roaches are the guys from New York. They infest, they are spooky smart, they are dirty and nasty, and you have to work really hard to get rid of them. Palmetto bugs however, are big and creepy and dumb. You usually see them outside at night and they will fly right at your face. They don’t infest because they are native and they can’t survive in our AC temps. 2.Every public indoor place will always be frigid. Most of your friend’s houses will be as well. I take a sweater with me almost everywhere that I go, and if I forget to I regret it. 3.Outside of weather emergencies, weathermen are superfluous. In the rainy season, which is most of the time, there is an eighty percent chance of rain, every single day. The weather man has no idea what time it will rain, how hard, or for how long, and there is no way for him to predict it. You just have to go out there with your fingers cr…

The Power Of Willful Ignorance

I watched a woman say these words in a speech a few moments ago and nothing could be more true...willful ignorance is insanely powerful. Willful ignorance is the reason that good German people allowed their neighbors to be dragged off by the Nazis in the middle of the night. It is the reason that American people choose to believe our homeless are lazy and irresponsible instead of facing the reality that their situations have arisen because of widespread mental illness and cooperate greed. It is the reason that you will pick up a steak on your way home from work tonight, not bothering to find out where it came from, because you just don’t want to know. The truth is too disgusting.
I have gone on about the meat industry quite a bit and my goal here is not to do that. I love to eat meat, I will state that again, but the example that comes from our consumption of factory meat is so powerful when it comes to explaining willful ignorance that I want to use it. Out of ALL of the many, many,…

Resolve to be Happy

1. Stay In

2. Read Books

3. Let it go to Voice Mail

4. Write a Letter

5. Dance

6. Invest in Mood Lighting

7. Have Dinner with Friends 

8. Take Walks

9. Bake

10. Breathe Deeply

11. Enjoy your Morning Coffee

12. Play Board Games

13. Hug your Pillows

14. Adopt a New Ritual

15. Look Around

16. Give a Gift

17. Happy Cry

18. Smile at Strangers

19. Cuddle

20. Savor Small Portions

21. Stretch

22. Take Pictures

23. Use Profanity Freely

24. Give Hugs

25. Listen Carefully

26. Beautify your Space

27. Share your Favorite Movie 

28. Laugh Generously

29. Accept Gifts Gratefully 

30. Give Thanks