Skip to main content

My Favorite Martian...Understanding my son.

My Favorite Martian

My son was born with a cool little collection of birthmarks on the side of his ribcage. Their configuration somewhat resembles a constellation. When he first started making sounds, his little baby cooing sounds were unusual. They were heavy in consonants, mostly ones that are found near the end of the alphabet. He would say: “Qui…Quay…Quiah…Zeek…Zurb.” He made sounds like that, over and over again, as he would look at my husband and I as though he were speaking directly to us. We started to jokingly wonder if he was speaking in his native language. We speculated as to whether his collection of birthmarks was a map back to his home planet.

My son’s behavior has only gotten stranger over the years. It is not because he is abnormal by any stretch of the imagination. He is a typical boy, one hundred percent, which is sort of like an alien. I didn’t have any siblings, and until I had my son, I had never spent much time around little baby boys. He is ten now and maturing, and all throughout his development his behavior has absolutely blown my mind. He is hilarious…a wandering little sponge of a human being.

It is extremely difficult to get my son’s attention. I remember that for a brief period, when he was younger, I was really concerned about it. I thought that maybe it was a sign that he was disengaged with us, that he didn’t care what we had to say when we spoke, or that he was too lazy to pay attention. I finally learned that none of those things come close to the reason that it is difficult to get through to him. The reason that he can be so hard to reach is because he becomes so intensely focused on whatever has captured his attention at that particular moment. The kid has a million different things going on in his mind, and he has to work pretty hard to pull himself out of it and pay attention to the world outside.

He has a need to touch everything. As we walk down the aisles in the grocery store he trails his fingers over every item. When he finishes using something, or gets distracted he just drops it where he stands, and leaves it where it falls, no thought of putting it away even in consideration. My son always has a Lego, or something plastic, in his mouth. I dutifully remind him to spit them out all day long. When he was younger I often caught him biting is own toenails, though I believe that we have finally broken him of that habit. He needs abundant outlets for physical and mental activity, his mind and body seek to constantly be in a state of discovery. My son is exploring his new planet.

So even though, to me his behavior seems completely alien. What I have learned is that he is just completely boy. Boys are certainly interesting little creatures. I think that they are unfortunately often misunderstood. Strong parenting skills are required to raise little boys into men. We constantly have to apply discipline and structure to our son’s life and we need to be diligent not to let the little things slip through the cracks. My husband and I work hard to parent our son from another planet. I’m exhausted just explaining it, and that's ironic, because boys get easier as they grow and well girls…I am totally in for it.

I have a simple favorite quote about boys. It pretty much sums them up:

Boy: A noise with Dirt on it.

I think that if we can accept that reality, and live through all of the cleaning up after them, as parents, we can get along with our sons pretty well. We get to enjoy watching them grow, and discovering our world. If we pay really close attention, we even get to learn from them along the way.


Popular posts from this blog

20 Things…you learn after moving to Florida.

20 Things…you learn after moving to Florida.
1.There is a big difference between a roach and a palmetto bug. Real roaches are the guys from New York. They infest, they are spooky smart, they are dirty and nasty, and you have to work really hard to get rid of them. Palmetto bugs however, are big and creepy and dumb. You usually see them outside at night and they will fly right at your face. They don’t infest because they are native and they can’t survive in our AC temps. 2.Every public indoor place will always be frigid. Most of your friend’s houses will be as well. I take a sweater with me almost everywhere that I go, and if I forget to I regret it. 3.Outside of weather emergencies, weathermen are superfluous. In the rainy season, which is most of the time, there is an eighty percent chance of rain, every single day. The weather man has no idea what time it will rain, how hard, or for how long, and there is no way for him to predict it. You just have to go out there with your fingers cr…

Phineas and Ferb...the positive cartoon.

Phineas and Ferb
I wrote a story previously that went into my dislike of Sponge Bob; so to be fair I will go into my love of the cartoon Phineas and Ferb. I had been adverse to it before I watched it, because I believed that it was probably like everything else that is geared towards kids of the same age group. It is not. The cartoon is completely unique, and as all great cartoons, it is equally enjoyable for children and adults.
The first thing that caught my attention was the unbridled creativity, and innocent intelligence that the two main characters possess. The boys can do anything; the sky is the limit. I believe that this is such a wonderful message for children. We, as parents, limit our own children more than we think. When I first took my kids to their 4H Lego Robotics club, I was completely blown away. I had no idea that my kids could put some blocks together, plug them into a computer, program them, and create a moving robot. An example of kids who can accomplish anything…

Christmas in Florida

Christmas in Florida
December tenth today and I swam my thirty laps in the pool. It’s pretty chilly, but I don’t really feel it after the second lap. I am so grateful that I am able to keep swimming this late into the season. My body responds much better to swimming than it does to running, and I still get a great cardio work out.
This is our seventh or eighth Christmas in Florida now. To be honest, it wasn’t much of an adjustment for me. I have lived in climates where we got tons of snow. I even graduated from high school in Northern Michigan, but I really don’t miss it. I am a worrier, so snow just makes me think of bad roads and car accidents. I think snow is absolutely gorgeous, but I don’t like the cold. I would be perfectly happy if snow stayed on mountains. I would visit it to ski.
I finally convinced my husband for the first time this year that we really did not need a tree. He is partial to real ones, and I have no real love for artificial trees. Not once in all of the years…